FAQ's - Transracial Adoption - Preface

A good friend asked this question the other day as we were discussing our adoption, "So, are you thinking - red and yellow, black and white, they are precious in His sight?" (Her way of asking if we are open to adopting a child of any ethnicity.) I loved the way she asked because I was able to say, simply, "Yes."

Yes, we are willing to welcome into our family a child of any ethnicity. I have TONS to say about this. Here's a little backstory - in the past few years God has awakened us to the darkness of racial preferences and has sown in us a DEEP passion to see this darkness pierced by the gospel of Jesus Christ. We have been involved in a church plant in our city that was started with this driving passion. We're pretty serious about it!

And, yet, when we started talking about adopting, I didn't know if I could love a child of another ethnicity as my own. I'm just being honest. This is another thing that was holding me back from starting the adoption process. I knew that it was right for us to be open to adopting a child of any ethnicity, but I was scared of what that would mean. For example, when I looked at black children at the park, I couldn't picture these kids as my own (probably because they weren't my own!)

I asked the Lord to change my heart. This sounds WAY too simple to say, but He changed my heart. How? I don't know - He's God! All I know is that over a period of time my heart grew a special affection for having a child in our family who doesn't share our skin tone. When the face of our next child flashes through my mind now, that precious little face does not have light skin. When I see families who have adopted transracially, it seems normal to me. It's just not an issue now. So, God answered my prayer.

I'm going to post much more about this issue of transracial adoption, but I wanted to start with this "preface" for a reason. I don't think any of us are "color blind" (whatever that really means). We all have a predisposition to prefer those who are like us. This is a fact - and a sin. Even though David and I are so passionate about racial reconciliation, my own heart struggled to line up with all the things I believe so deeply. I tried to talk to myself about this, but I didn't listen. : ) I worried over all the implications that a transracial adoption would mean for our family. I worried about adopting a child of a different ethnicity and that child resenting me for it. I worried about what was wrong with me and how I was going to fix it. All the energy this required made me realize that reconciliation at any level is a work of God and that I needed Him to work on my own heart. And He did.

So, if you have experienced some of these same reservations about adopting a child that is different from you, don't be discouraged. Just because it is a struggle doesn't mean that it isn't for you. I'm sure that most people who adopt a child of a different ethnicity have had the same feelings and questions I had. And, like every other issue that arises with your adoption, God will do whatever it takes to bring your child home. Even if it means conquering the fears in your very own heart.