Adoption is Hard

K was not able to sign the surrender this morning. I know it seems unlikely if you don't know the details, but we really do believe that she will sign. There have been a series of unfortunate events that have kept her from making it to court. In any case, we are still waiting, hoping, praying and trusting God's plan.

I was wondering to myself, do I regret opening up our story on this blog as it is unfolding, especially since it has been a difficult waiting period. I don't regret it. My initial reason for starting this blog about our adoption journey was to share what adoption is really like for those who might be considering it. This is what it is really like, I have learned. Some adoptions go off without a hitch, but most of them have bumps along the way.

We heard Russell Moore speak about adoption in our city several months ago. He talked about how adoption is hard. He discouraged people from adopting if they have some romanticized view of what it will involve. The process is difficult in so many ways. It should just be easy when people are willing to adopt and there are children who need to be adopted. But, Russell Moore says that there is a real resistance in the spiritual realm against children in general and adoption specifically. It was comforting to hear him identify this dynamic. If we believe in the supernatural realm at all, and I do, then I know there is a resistance against God's "agenda," and the Bible makes it clear that children are often at the center of God's agenda. So, when a baby is coming into a home where he will hear the Gospel and see it lived out, of course there will be resistance and struggle.

In our situation, it seems that K is the one who is having to bear the brunt of this struggle. I can't share details, but she has had a very hard time since Evan was born. It would be easy, in my haste, to be frustrated with her for not getting to court and signing. Or, to be suspicious as to what is really going on. But, the Gospel compels me to care about her and all that she is going through. This isn't just about us.

Don't get me wrong - I REALLY want her to make it to court ASAP and sign the surrender. I have prayed for that and would appreciate your prayers as well. But, I've realized that I need to be praying for HER, not just praying for her to sign. I am praying that this cycle of hardship will be broken in her life. We really believe everything will be okay in the end, for our family, but I don't want to forget to care about whether or not she will be okay, too.

So, we are in the thick of one of the most difficult parts of domestic adoption and I will say that it is worth it. I would do it again. Adoption is hard, but it is right.

Here is an article by Russell Moore called "Don't Adopt" that is an excellent read. And, please don't be offended if you are a cat lover.

As far as updates, let's just say that I will let you know when the surrender is signed, which will hopefully be this week. Keep praying!!